


my eyes went dark (don't wanna fall asleep just yet)

by Zartbitterpoetin



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I mean it's pretty telling that that's the first tag that came to mind, Misunderstandings, Past Torture, Recovery, Torture, Whump, but it's not the focus of the fic, but yeah... whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-19
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2020-09-07 19:36:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20314897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zartbitterpoetin/pseuds/Zartbitterpoetin
Summary: Ahk dreamed of being free from his coffin, sometimes, before he remembered the last time he had met other people and then he thought that maybe the best thing would be to not exist at all.or: Ahkmenrah was tortured by the scientists at Cambridge and thinks everyone at the museum will treat him like they did.





	my eyes went dark (don't wanna fall asleep just yet)

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in the span of two nights and normally this amount of words takes me so much longer but it just... didn't this time.  
This is weirdly self indulgent and I never thought I'd ever write something for this fandom.  
The title is from "This Is Home" by Cavetown.

Ahkmenrah is a little overwhelmed, to say the least. Everything in the museum is loud, and bright and, ironically, full of life. It’s a stark contrast to what has been his existence the last years. 

There had only been darkness for so long, darkness and not enough room and the loneliness that seemed to swallow him. Sometimes he had felt the others in the building and heard them, too. It was pathetic, how he grasped for their voices in a desperate attempt to feel something other than the anger and sadness and loneliness and fear, so much fear. 

Ahk dreamed of being free from his coffin, sometimes, before he remembered the last time he had met other people and then he thought that maybe the best thing would be to not exist at all.

Maybe he would just go insane. Maybe he already was. Sane people certainly didn’t whisper to themselves or bang for hours against the coffin because maybe this time it will work, maybe I’m finally strong enough, maybe someone will hear and help me. Well, sane people also usually didn’t end up trapped in a sarcophagus for years, to be fair. 

He practiced English, sometimes. He had been long enough in Cambridge to learn the language very well and when, if he got out, he wanted to make the best impression he could. He had the suspicion that he didn’t actually need to do that, as he seemed to have no problems understanding the exhibits, no matter what language they spoke in. That seemed to be part of the tablets power. Still, practicing English gave him something to do. 

And then, someone had finally freed him. It wasn’t really how he had expected it to go, but he was grateful nevertheless. Larry and his son Nick seemed nice enough, if nervous and, understandably, scared. And also, apparently, desperate for his help because the damn tablet had been stolen and his guards were currently threatening them with their weapons. 

Ahkmenrah felt warm at the thought, that at least here he had some kind of protection, if he really needed it. Of course, that would mean nothing, once the night ended, he would be helpless then, but still. Small comforts. After calling back the guards, the introductions and a brief summary of the situation, they had set out to reclaim the tablet. 

The following events were like faint memories from a fever dream. After years with nothing to see and little to hear, everything was so much now. The ground under his feet and all the colours, and the different people who felt vaguely familiar but of course didn’t know him. 

After they defeated the old night guards, and after a ride on the back of a T-Rex with Nick, there had been some awkward conversations until someone started to play music, which lead to the situation he was in now: Standing in the main hall with everybody dancing, laughing, playing games and, in general, having a good time. 

He tries to only feel the relieved joy of having reclaimed the tablet and finally being free from the coffin, but he can sense the contained fear and suspicion of him in the other exhibits and it makes him uneasy and hurt and scared and angry, because what reason do they have to be scared of him? 

What reason did they have, to never even attempt to understand or help him? But he can’t dwell on that, he can’t, not when this might be the last night he has in freedom for a long time. 

So he focuses on other things: how grateful he is that he was helpful because that meant they needed him and that means being free from the coffin. How he could, maybe, maybe have the chance to have another night out in the museum, if he only behaves right. 

He knows how this works. Cambridge taught him many things. 

But first he must find out more, lest he accidentally worsens the situation. 

He approaches Sacajawea and Teddy casually. Since the battle they seem to not have left each other’s side and it’s really cute, if Ahk is being honest. He doesn’t want to disturb them, but they are also the ones, he feels the most comfortable with at the moment. 

That doesn’t mean much, of course, not when it was the president who was one of those who actively warned against the pharaoh, but he seems reasonable enough and Sacajawea just has something incredible kind about her. 

When the president sees him walking towards them, a shadow of some feeling that Ahk can’t quite place crosses his face and the same emotion is echoed a few moments later on Sacajaweas face. “Ms. Sacajawea, Mr. Roosevelt,” he greets them with a friendly nod. “I hope I’m not intruding upon you, but I wanted to acquire something.” 

“You’re not intruding, son,” the president replies, but his face tells a different story and Ahkmenrah curses internally. One thing he got wrong already. Obvious to his thoughts, Teddy continues, “Just go ahead and ask.” Ahkmenrah fights the urge to ring his hands nervously. “I was wondering, if there is anything you would like me to do around here?” he finally asks.

Teddy chuckles and Sacajawea shakes her head with a smile. Ahk knows that they probably mean it in a nice, playful way, but he can already feel his heart starting to race and panic creeping up on him. 

“Don’t worry about it. The night is still young and we have just won a battle,” Sacajawea tells him and lays a hand on his shoulders. She probably wants to offer him comfort, but the gestures startles him, so he tries to hide a flinch and just smiles.

“Of course,” he says and inclines his head, “but I would still like to think that I can be of some assistance.” After a few moments, Teddy says with a thoughtful frown, “In this chaotic place, we can always use a helping hand, but maybe you should ask Lawrence instead. 

He has proven himself to be a good leader and I have promised myself in turn to not interfere with the organization of every exhibition for a while.” With an incredible soft look to his hand that’s intertwined with Sacajaweas, he adds, “And besides, it is really nice to just enjoy the time with someone you love, without having to worry constantly.” 

Sacajawea nudges him playfully. “Don’t pretend that you aren’t going to be fretting about the others like a mother hen again by tomorrow night,” she says and smirks and he laughs and they are very much in love and caught up with each other so Ahk just leaves a bit awkwardly, but happy for them. 

He ignores the jealous sting in his breast and the panic that only seems to get worse. The conversation didn’t help him as much as he hoped it would, but that isn’t their fault.

He just has to find Larry now and pray that everything turns out fine. He will find a way to make himself useful and them maybe the night guard will release him the next night too, and the night after that. 

Finding Larry isn’t difficult, as he is observing the party in the main hall from a safe distance, standing on the second floor. Ahk joins him quietly and stands a few meters behind him. 

“Guardian of Brooklyn,” he says, even though he is pretty sure that isn’t a proper title. Maybe it will make the other man laugh or at least not let him feel like Ahkmenrah is a threat. Apparently, Larry hadn’t noticed the Pharaoh approaching, as he jumps a little at the sound of his voice and spins around, flashlight raised as a weapon, but relaxes when he sees Ahkmenrah. 

“Oh, hey,” he says, and seems to be a little embarrassed. “Why aren’t you down there celebrating?” he asks and gestures to the main hall. The huns are currently doing some kind of mixture between dancing and fighting with each other, while Nick is playing fetch with Rexy. Someone has found an air horn and is using it frequently, while some of the little romans have united with some of the wild west exhibits to erect a very small monument in honor of their victory.

Ahk doesn’t comment on any of it. Instead he says, “I was looking for you.” Then he smiles a little sheepish and looks down. A trick he learned back in Cambridge. Makes him look softer, non-threatening. Less like someone you wanted to put away. 

“I came here to ask, if I could be of some assistance to you. I really want to do something. Make myself useful, you know?” He adds the last part to avoid a repetition of the conversation he just had with Sacajawea and Teddy. And besides, it is true. He wants to do something, so they will let him out again. 

Larry looks a bit surprised, but Ahk isn’t sure if it is just a façade or not. After all, Larry heard him scream and pond against the sarcophagus, of that he is sure and he only helped him out when his life was in danger.  
He was ready to leave him there, just like everybody else. And like everybody else, he must expect some form of payment for it, right? The night guard can pretend all he wants, but he has used Ahkmenrah already, and he will do it again, no matter how surprised he acts now. 

But Ahk doesn’t care about this, he doesn’t because he is grateful that he is allowed to have this. And if Larry gives him the chance to gain even more days outside of his personal hell, then he’ll gladly take it, no matter what. 

“I guess you could help bringing everyone back to their exhibition. You seem to be pretty good at languages. That will make things easier,” Larry says with a thoughtful smile. “How do you know so many anyway?” 

For a moment, Ahkmenrah considers lying to him, to claim that he doesn’t know. He is strangely protective of his limited knowledge of the tablet, because knowledge is one of the few things that truly belong to him, that can’t be taken away. But maybe if he is honest, Larry will see his good will and will be more inclined to be nice and considerate. 

“I think the tablet is responsible for that,” he admits, defeated. Larry just grins and says, “Man, that thing is so strange – but in a cool way, you know?” Ahkmenrah nods and smiles a bit, even though he doesn’t really know.

As suggested by the night guard, an hour before sunrise, he does indeed help with organizing everything, translating a lot and thus working almost constantly in close proximity to Larry. 

Although it is a little stressful to make sure that everything is how it’s supposed to be, Ahkmenrah is surprised that it’s also fun. He’s already grown fond of many exhibits with their quirky habits and unique personalities and watching them bicker and banter with each other makes him all warm and fuzzy inside. Especially when they address him too, when they try to include him in the conversations. 

Additionally, Larry is already nicer than most people he encountered in Cambridge and as long as he doesn’t anger him or make too many mistakes, Ahk seems to have pretty good chances of being let out tomorrow too. He is one of the last exhibits to get back and Larry accompanies him. Nick has fallen asleep and they just carried him to the couch in Larrys office, so it’s only him and the night guard, as Teddy and Sacajawea are still in their own little world. 

The closer they get to the coffin, the more his heart starts to race in his chest. With shaking hands he climbs back into the sarcophagus and pushes the urge to cry away. He will get through this, he thinks, one last time enjoying the light. And then the darkness surrounds him and all he wants to do is scream.

When he wakes up, everything is black. He tries to swallow the bitter disappointment. Of course your plan didn’t work. Did you really think you did enough yesterday? They won’t let you out again and it’s all your fault. You should have done more, shown them how valuable you are. Now you will never get that chance again. 

His thoughts are interrupted, when he hears someone unlocking the coffin lid. For a moment, he considers the possibility that his mind is playing a cruel joke on him but then he tries to lift the cover and it actually works. He is greeted by the sight of a grinning Teddy Roosevelt, holding out his arm to help him out of the casket. “Good night, dear Ahkmenrah.”

He continues that strategy for the next days, helping whenever and wherever he can, making himself valuable and useful and it seems to work. He is always freed in the first minutes of the night and he can control his fear for those minutes and the other exhibits are really, really nice. 

Of course, there are nicer to each other and he knows that he hasn’t any friends but they haven’t tried to actively harm him yet and they actually seem to care about his opinion on some things and that is almost too good to be true. 

He thinks that it might be a test, so he just shrugs or gives very vague answers when they ask for his opinion. Better not to anger them. This strategy goes well for the first week, but they still seem unsatisfied, somehow.

“So, dude, what’s up with you?” Jedediah greets him and folds his tiny arms. Besides him is standing Octavius, with a serious expression on his face. These days, it is rare to see the two separated and Ahk wonders, when they’ll finally admit their love for each other. 

They’ll certainly make a cute couple, although they won’t be quite able to match Teddy and Sacajawea, who are both currently sitting nearby, engrossed in a lively discussion with Larry. 

Ahk looks down to the tiny people and offers them their hand to sit on, which they gladly do. “Nothing,” he finally answers Jedediahs question. 

“You sure, man?” the cowboy asks again. Octavius seems to agree, nodding his head and wearing the same expression as his companion. “You have just been very quiet. And you are very nice, almost too nice, when we all…” the general says, but trails off at the end. 

Suddenly, the group behind them goes silent and Larry, Sacajawea and Teddy are looking at them. The tiny roman shrugs and frowns at the three listeners. “We’ve all been wondering, don’t pretend you didn’t,” he tells them. 

There is a sinking feeling in Ahks stomach and he carefully sets the two men down again. Just as carefully he asks, “What have you been wondering?” 

There is silence for a few moments, an uncomfortable and suffocating thing until Jedediah finally breaks it. “Oh, fuck it. We’re wondering why you ain’t mad at us. We really didn’t treat you nicely and it must have been horrible for you, to be trapped in there for so long.” Ahkmenrah is stunned for a moment. He really didn’t expect that. For a moment he wonders if he should be honest, but he isn’t that stupid. 

The scientists at Cambridge used to do something similar, to trick him into punishments. Ask him questions and then punish him for giving the wrong answers – answers that were too emotional or defiant. 

But he has learned his lesson, he won’t fall for it again, no matter how nice the others seem. Still, he struggles with his words. 

“Oh, it wasn’t so bad. I had a lot of time to think and practice languages. Of course, I’d prefer not being in there, but it wasn’t your fault. I’m just grateful to be able to be here now.” He looks in their faces, but they don’t seem satisfied. In fact, they seem more unhappy. He feels fear creeping up his spine and he quickly plasters a smile on his face. 

“It really isn’t a big deal. I promise.” He hopes that this will be enough. Ahk tries to make himself smaller and to hide his shaking hands, but it doesn’t seem to work because Larry takes one look at him and something in his face changes. 

“How about you go rest for a while? You really don’t seem well. You can use the couch in my office.” The others agree and all he can think is no, no, no, I fucked it up. I fucked up and now they’ve finally had enough. It’s a surprise it too them so long, I suppose. 

Because he knows what rest means when they say it like this. The scientists made that clear pretty soon, that if he wanted to avoid further punishment he better behave and not move a muscle or say a single word, he better lay down and be at least a pretty decoration, if he already wasn’t good at anything else. 

He didn’t think Larry and the others would be so cruel as to formulate it as a suggestion, though. As if he has a choice, as if he would choose to lay down still like a corpse (and they loved to make that joke, the scientists) and not move. But he can’t say any of that, of course and they are still looking at him expectantly, so he swallows his feelings and gives them a tired smile. 

“That sounds like a good idea,” he tells them. They even accompany him to the office and act like it’s a kindness. With an inviting hand, Larry gestures to the couch and at another occasion he would find it kind, sweet even, but now he only feels anger and so much fear. 

He lays dow, carefully, because he doesn’t know when they’ll allow him to move again and blinks away tears before he goes very, very still. They continue talking and he should be used to that, but it still hurts, to hear them joke with each other and be happy, while he can do nothing at all. Still, he doesn’t move a muscle. He’ll do anything so they will let him out again.

It all goes to shit when he accidently damages Sacajawea a few days later. 

Some puritans and soldiers had decided to play football in the main hall with furniture from various exhibitions and Larry, Teddy and Sacajawea had tried to convince them to stop for a good fifteen minutes now. 

Ahk had watched them amused and then quietly started to gather the furniture to return it. He is holding a vase and standing a few feet away from the others, when suddenly a group of screaming Neanderthals enters the hall. Startled and before he can even register what is happening, he drops the vase. 

For a small moment, nothing happens and Ahkmenrah looks down on the destroyed vase and then up, where Sacajawea is holding her arm with a surprised look on her face and then time continues and everything happens all at once. The Neanderthals scream even louder and the football team starts running around like headless chicken, while Terry and Sacajawea look on horrified, as they see the damage some of the shards did to her arm. 

There are deep cuts and some shards are still stuck in the wax. Ignoring everyone else, Teddy and Larry help a shocked Sacajawea to remove the shards and review the damage while Ahkmenrah seems to be incapable of moving his body. All he can feel is pure horror because not only did he destroy a vase from one of the exhibitions, he also damaged Sacajawea. 

And that is something they definitely won’t forgive him. For a short moment he considers just running away and hiding, but he knows that won’t work for long. If he could just move and try to gather the remains of the vase at least, but his body just won’t cooperate. Maybe it’s better that way, maybe the punishment won’t be as bad if he shows his obedience. 

Meanwhile, Sacajaweas arm seems to be free from shards now, which causes Larry and Teddy to focus on the cause of the injury: the young pharaoh who is still just standing there, with a numb look on his face. 

“What were you thinking?” Teddy snaps. “We can be glad she isn’t more badly damaged,” Larry adds. He takes a few steps closer and lays a hand on Ahkmenrahs shoulder, who can’t hide a flinch.

He feels like a deer in the headlights, and he still doesn’t know what to do. “You could have hurt Lawrence too, you know. Just be more careful!” he hears Teddys voice but it’s like he is underwater. 

He sees Larry moving his lips but he hears nothing, just a ringing noise inside his head. All he can see is the anger on their faces, and everything is kind of blurry and only when Larry shakes him a little, the world finally falls back into tune. “… can you tell me?” Is the first thing he hears again, but he can only shake his head.

“Is Sacajawea alright?” he finally presses out and Larry nods, pointing behind him. She and Teddy have sat down a few feet away and she seems fine, which is good. He genuinely likes her, he really does, but she definitely won’t like him after this incident.

“Just a bit shocked, I’d say. Now let us clean up this mess, before someone else gets damaged,” Larry tells him and Ahk nods obediently. He knows how this goes, he accidently destroyed and damaged some things in Cambridge too. “Stay here, I’ll be back in a minute,” Larry tells him, vanishes and leaves Ahk behind. 

He tries to swallow around the lump in his throat and crouches down, starting to pick up the shards. Some of the scientists liked to watch him clean up the mess he made, knowing that a punishment would soon follow. 

They sneered and laughed as he frantically tried to clean everything up as fast as possible, to avoid angering them further. One of them shoved Ahkmenrah almost every time he saw him, in the hope that he’d let something fall and then made him clean it up while talking about what a disappointment and failure the pharaoh was.

But he isn’t in Cambridge anymore and this time, it was entirely his fault and he continues collecting the shards and doesn’t notice Larrys return until the other man speaks up. 

“What are you doing?” he says loudly and Ahk spins around at the sound. The night guard is standing there with a baffled expression, and dustpan and brush in his hands.

“I told you to wait, Ahk! Man, you didn’t have to use your bare hands.” He knew it. He should have waited, not just assumed – the rules in this place aren’t similar to Cambridge but he still hasn’t figured out what exactly they are and now he has somehow managed to make everything even worse. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, and he is desperate and frightened and so he does something that always pleased the scientists – he kneels. Some of the smaller shards he hasn’t picked up yet dig painfully into his knees, but he ignores them. 

Something in him screams, the rest of his pride rebels against this, no matter how often he has done it now. But the pain and humiliation is worth it if he can lessen his punishment. If he can convince them not to hurt him too much, not to put him away (again). 

“I know this was my fault and I will clean everything up and it won’t happen again.” He can’t actually promise them that, but he’ll say anything right now. ”I’m sorry that I didn’t wait and just assumed things. I’ll listen next time.” He looks down, not wanting to see whatever emotion is on Larrys face and for a few terrible moments nothing happens. 

He almost expects a punch or a kick in the stomach or a slap in the face, but instead there is a soft hand on his shoulders. He flinches as if he has been struck and finally looks up to see Larry standing there, with horrified eyes and concern etched deep into the lines of his face. “It’s alright, don’t worry, okay?” he says. “I’m gonna clean up the rest. Just sit down there with Teddy and Wea.” 

Ahk is kind of lost. Why doesn’t Larry make him clean up the rest? And why hasn’t he hurt him yet? Maybe he is planning something bigger, maybe simply hitting or cutting him with the shards isn’t enough. Maybe the wait is part of the punishment. 

The scientist did that sometimes, making him wait while they decided what to do next. Sometimes they even forced him to suggest something and when they thought his suggestion were to mild, they doubled the punishment. 

But they never cleaned up his mess. It’s scary, that he doesn’t know the protocol for this new thing, but he has already fucked up enough today so he just follows the orders and sits down with the couple. They both have concerned looks on their faces. 

“How is your arm?” he asks softly before he can stop himself. “Oh, nothing a little handwork kit can’t fix,” she says. “Listen, Ahk, that can happen to everyone. I’m a bit clumsy myself,” she tells him and Ted chuckles at that. 

He doesn’t know what to think of that. Why is she comforting him? Is that part of their strategy or is she being honest? Why are they both so nice to him, even after this? He hunches together and tries to draw as little attention to him as possible. Strangely, Teddy and Sacajawea, who usually always chatter with each other, have gone quiet. But right now, he doesn’t have the energy to care. He just wants this to be over. 

Finally, Larry is finished with cleaning up and walks towards them. He shares a glance with the couple beside Ahkmenrah, and there seems to be a silent conversation between the three, but he doesn’t know what it is about. “Ahk, I think we might need to talk to you,” Larry says and Ahk can only panic silently. 

“Don’t worry, we don’t have to talk right away. Sunrise is close anyway and I think we might all need a little rest, and in Sacajaweas case also a repair kit, to process this little shock. Besides, I’ll have to look after the Neanderthals soon. We can talk about this tomorrow, alright? Just go rest for a while, kid.” 

And although he tries to smother it, he feels a hint of desperate hatred in himself because at least the scientists were upfront about their punishments and didn’t cloak them in suggestions and kind words. 

But he can’t disobey and he is already familiar with this particular punishment, so he mumbles his goodbye and vanishes to his tomb and lies down in the coffin but doesn’t close the lid. They never explicitly told him that he had to, so he doesn’t and Larry doesn’t say anything when he finally comes around to lock the sarcophagus, just looks at him with this strange expression on his face, so it must have been enough and then everything goes dark again. 

The next night, they let him out as usual and he is almost surprised at that. He had expected them to let him lie there for at least an hour or two. But still, something has changed, he can feel and hear it, as there is often an awkward silence today, and odd glances and there is something tense and raw in the air he can’t quite place. 

Finally, Larry leads him to a calm corner of the museum, where a little group has gathered. Sacajawea and Teddy are there, of course, and Octavius and Jedediah too, and they are all sitting around in a little circle. They seemed to have waited for him, and his heart sinks in his stomach because this can only be a bad thing, that they felt the need to talk over what to do next. 

They must have something big in mind. Before he can say anything, Teddy greets him with a “Welcome, lad. Make yourself comfortable.” He sits down, Larry follows suit and for a few moments, there is just another awkward silence. “We wanted to talk to you, Ahk. About your behavior,” Larry says and he hadn’t thought it possible but Ahk feels his stomach drop even more. 

“I’m sorry, really. I’ve been unacceptable,” he starts to say, frantic, and then, “ I’ve spoken out of turn and not listened enough to you. But yesterday was a mistake I won’t make again, you don’t need to– “

“No! Stop! That’s exactly what we’re talking about!” Jed interrupts and they all nod in agreement. Oh. No, please. Some of the scientists didn’t like him talking at all. They told him to shut up and do what he was told. His voice is something he treasures, because when he is locked up, at least he can still talk and sing and his skill with languages is something he is very proud of. And now they want to take that away from him too. 

He can feel tears gathering in his eyes and his breath becoming shallower and quicker and he feels a hand on his knees, but this time he doesn’t hide his flinch but instead scrambles away a bit. He knows what happens next. 

They used to tell him to be silent to prevent him from screaming and sometimes they touched him, everywhere at once and he hated it because he needed human touch but at the same time their hands made his skin crawl. But if he can keep his voice that way, he’ll let them do everything. 

“Please,” he begs. “Don’t force me to be silent. I will do everything you want, you have seen how useful I can be. I’m sorry that I angered you but you don’t have to punish me this way.” 

He is rambling, still pressed as far away from the others as possible, but he has to convince them. Larry opens his mouth to respond but before he can say anything, Ahkmenrah continues because his argument isn’t strong enough yet. 

“Look, I’ll cooperate with you if you just let me keep my voice. I could give you suggestions for what to do next, I can praise you and help you – you know I’m good with languages, right? It would be a shame if you wouldn’t use that. And I know that it’s your decision but just think of all the possibilities you would erase this way.” 

His rant doesn’t work, it only seems to make everything worse. From several corners he hears denials of his offer and suddenly he is afraid that he is not only going to lose his voice but his freedom from the sarcophagus as well. 

And that is when he becomes truly desperate, a desperation that fills him down to his bones and if you’d strip away the skin from him now you’d see the raw emotions pulsating though his body: Shame and Anger and Fear and Humiliation and Disgust. He swallows bile and pushes down the revulsion and uses his last resort: his body. 

Slowly, he turns back to Larry, slides closer and takes his hand. He likes the night guard, he is just such a chaotic fatherly figure to all of them and that makes this even more wrong, but he doesn’t know what else to do. 

Some of the scientists told him he was pretty and they liked to touch him, so that must mean that he is fairly attractive, right? 

“I can make it up to you,” he says and his voice doesn’t waver even though he wants to cry. Larry tries to free his hand from his grip but the pharaoh is holding on tight. “If you let me keep my voice and will not lock me up again, you can do everything you want to me.” He hopes that the man won’t notice that he could already do that anyway, if he wanted to. “Just think about it. You wouldn’t even have to force me, I promise.” 

He tries to work a seductive tone into his speech, but it comes out more sad and pathetic. Repulsed Larry finally manages to free his hand and then stares at Ahkmenrah in shock. 

“Christ, Ahk,” he says, and then, hurt, “What kind of man do you think I am?” 

And that is when his last measure of hope dies and is replaced with a big nothingness. He is frozen to his place, can’t even move his eyes because that’s it for him and he starts shaking because it isn’t fair, that he had to humiliate himself so much and that he gave everything and it still isn’t enough. 

Larry is saying something, talking to him but he can’t focus right now. The others have come closer and have crowded around him and it’s all too much. Finally, he can hear the words again. 

“It’s okay. We’re not mad, really. Just concerned,” Larry tells him and although Ahk doesn’t believe him, the it manages to calm him down enough. “I would never want that, not from you and not when you clearly don’t want it either. You don’t have to ask us for permission to speak, you don’t have to do something just because we tell you to. Why –“ and his voice breaks and he seems to be at a loss for words. 

“Why are you so afraid of us?” Sacajawea asks in a soft voice, filled with sorrow, taking over for the guard.

When Ahk doesn’t answer, Octavius adds, “We will not hurt you – quite the opposite; you can always trust that we will do everything to protect you. We all protect each other, and you belong to us!” 

Jed besides him offers his hand and Octavius takes it, blushing, and they stand there fiercely and with loyalty in their eyes. When Ahk looks up, he sees that sentiment echoed in the faces of the others and for the first time, a part of him starts believing them. 

But it could also be a ruse – another thing Cambridge taught him. The kindest faces could have the cruelest actions behind them and sometimes they liked to pretend they wanted to be friends, to be kind and then they snapped when he was least expecting it. 

“So might you tell us what is bothering you? And the truth this time because you are clearly not well, Ahkmenrah,” Teddy says and yes, this might all be a trick, but he is exhausted and tired, so he finally gives in. 

“I just don’t know what the rules are here,” he admits. “Rules?” Larry asks, confused. “What rules? I mean don’t stay out past dawn and try to not be a dick, but what else?” Ahk doesn’t know if the night guard is being honest or mocking him but decides to answer in earnest. 

“Well, rules like, can I look you in the eye? Do you want me to only say something when spoken to,” and here he pauses, taking a deep breath, “or do you want me to kneel when you enter the room?” 

He decides to leave out more examples of orders, he really doesn’t want to give them any ideas, and instead continues with the punishments, hoping that they won’t notice. 

“What happens when I mess something up? Will you hit me or cut me? Force me to hurt myself? What do you want from me? I just don’t get it! And I’m grateful that you let me out every night and you’ve only punished me twice so far but you can’t expect me to be good when you haven’t even told me what you expect!” 

He realizes he is getting louder, but he doesn’t really care. He’ll finally know what he is supposed to do here. 

“We punished you?” Sacajawea asks and there is a horror in her eyes that Ahk doesn’t understand. At the same time, Larry blurts out, “That’s why you are afraid of us?” He sounds equally horrified and Ahkmenrah doesn’t know how to react – this isn’t going at all how he expected it to go. He chuckles nervously. 

“Well, remember when you told me to rest while you all chatted around me and I wasn’t allowed to move? I mean, I’m not new to such things, I know what you expected from me but it would be better if you just ordered me instead of pretending that you are asking me. And of course I’m a little afraid of you but that doesn’t mean that I can’t do my duty.” 

He is aware that he is sounding desperate now but there is also the voice inside his head that tells him that they really don’t know and that frightens him. Because that means that he has been living in constant fear when he could have enjoyed the first real freedom he has had for decades. 

“When did you think we punished you?” Teddy asks in a strangled voice. Ahk thinks that they are laying it on a bit thick now but he’ll play along. What choice does he have? 

“When you asked me how I felt and I didn’t give you a satisfying answer? I mean obviously it wasn’t nice for me in there. It was horrible and I hate the darkness and you could all hear me scream and rattle against the coffin.”

He is standing up now because fuck it, if he is going to tell the truth then he will do it properly. No holding back. If they really don’t want to hurt him then this will prove it and if they were lying, well at least then he knows where he stands. 

“I mean, of course it was horrible! The loneliness, the close space – I couldn’t even sit up and everything is too tight in there and I constantly had the feeling that I would suffocate but you were all too scared to even attempt to free or even just understand me!” 

All the anger and resentment and sorrow he had bottled up for so long are finally breaking free and he didn’t even know he felt all those emotions so strongly but somehow once he has begun he can’t seem to stop. 

“And Teddy, you were one of the worst. Warning against me, keeping other exhibits away from me. I could feel how scared you all were of me, you fucking cowards, and night after night I laid there hoping, begging for someone to save me and when you finally did–,“ he is turning to Larry now, “it was only out of desperation. Only because I could be useful to you.” There are ugly sobs building up in his chest but he manages to hold them back.

“And so I’ve tried to be the most valuable to you because I know that you will put me away again once you don’t need me anymore!” He is breathing heavily now and for a few moments he feels invincible, like nothing they are going to say or do now could harm him. 

And then the weight of what he has just done comes crashing down on him. He suddenly feels very light and vaguely ill and sits down and draws his knees close, so close that he can’t see their faces. And then he can’t hold the sobs in any longer and he just sits there and hugs himself and wishes he wouldn’t exist anymore. 

“We are deeply sorry. There is no excuse for how we behaved or for the part I played in your misery”, he hears Teddy say. 

And Sacajawea adds, “We didn’t know you felt that way. We will never punish you for anything or hurt you willingly or trap you in that thing again and it doesn’t matter what you say or how useful you are. We would never hurt you because you belong to us and we belong to you. We’re family here, even if we have apparently made a miserable job of showing you, so far.” 

At her words, Ahk finally dares to look up. There is so much emotion on their faces, horror and sadness and pity, but a comforting kind of pity. “May I hug you?” Sacajawea asks and he loves that she asks and he nods because he thinks a hug might actually be exactly what he needs right now and because his world is falling apart a little because they really seem sincere and if there are no consequences for him screaming at them then they probably really mean it and he starts to grasp what that means for him, when the medic wraps her arms around him. 

“Group hug?”, Larry besides him suggest and Ahk nods again and they all pile over each other and it’s so cozy and comfortable and for the first time in forever Ahk feels actually safe. 

They must be careful as not to crush Jedediah and Octavius and after a minute or two they pull apart again, some with tears in their eyes. 

“Can I ask you something else?” Larry says and waits for Ahks nod of approval before he continues. 

“All this stuff you mentioned – rules and punishments – you have experienced them, right? And because of that you expected us to be the same.” Ahk sighs, but he thinks he owns them an answer. 

“Yes. As you know, before I came here, I was at Cambridge. Now, there are certainly a lot of nice people there, but I had the misfortune of mainly encountering the unpleasant sort. The scientists of my department figured out the power of the tablet pretty fast and at first their interaction with me were strictly scientific. 

But as time went on, they started doing – other things. When I accidently damaged a glass one night they made me clean it up and then ordered me to stay down, on the floor. Of course, I didn’t obey them at first; a pharaoh kneels before no one!” He laughs bitterly. 

“But the next night, they simply didn’t let me out of my box. They had bound my hands and feet together and it was somehow even worse than the coffin and when they finally let me out three nights later and told me to kneel, well, I did. After that, they started to push the boundaries of what I would do. They made me serve them and assist them with everything and when I messed up they started experimenting with my pain tolerance. 

In the beginning it was only beatings, but they got more creative. They made me apologize for speaking without being prompted and made me stand still for hours and if I didn’t want to do whatever humiliating thing they had thought of next, I would end up in the box again and it’s strange because that is so much worse than a beating or your muscles cramping because you have to stand perfectly still for hours. 

It’s worse because when you’re there, alone and without any sight or hearing, you start hearing and seeing things. You go insane. When they hurt me, at least they were talking to me or touching me.” 

The others look horrified at his story and about ready to cry. Awkwardly, he pats Larrys back. “It’s alright guys,” he says. “You aren’t like them at all.” He smiles crookedly but real. “We should be the ones comforting you,” Larry protests. 

“Yeah, we just let you believe that stuff for weeks all because we were too cowardly to properly apologize and make things right with you,” Jedediah agrees. 

Octavius speaks up too, “We were scared to confront you, even though we knew that there was something wrong, that you were frightened yourself. For that and for all the years we didn’t help you: We are really sorry.” 

At first, Ahk wants to play it down, say that it’s alright, but that isn’t really the truth. The truth is: He is still hurt and he is definitely not fine. He likes these guys, but he is also angry at them. He will protect them, but he will also start to openly disagree with them. It’s all a bit messy, but they’ll figure it out. So he just says, “Okay.” 

It get’s easier after that. His little group checks in with him so often it could get kind of annoying if it weren’t so cute and if Ahkmenrah wouldn’t still need it because even though he rationally knows that he isn’t in any danger, that he won’t be punished for anything, that he is safe, it’s still very hard sometimes. 

He finds himself agreeing to something just because he thinks he has to do it and when Sacajawea then asks him, if it is really okay for him, if he really wants to do this and tells him that it is alright if he doesn’t, it helps. 

“Actually,” he’ll say, “I would rather not do it. Sorry.” And everyone will shrug and continue with their day and his friends will hug him, but only after getting permission. 

That’s another thing he is working on – his touch-starvation and simultaneously his aversion to touch sometimes. The others tell him it’s alright, but he is still bothered by it, that his feelings can’t be easy for once.

They say that it’s okay to not know what to feel, and sometimes he mistrusts them so much because they are too nice. They all put little glow in the dark stars on the inner walls of the coffin and it really helps him in the few minutes after sundown and before sunrise. Larry buys him awfully bright shirts because Ahk just loves the horrible clashing colours and Sacajawea knits hats and scarfs for him because he loves their soft feel on his skin. 

After a few weeks, he slowly allows his witty, sarcastic side to show. The first time he makes a dark joke, everyone pauses for a moment and stares at him. For a second, he feels fear creeping up but he quickly shuts it down. It’s alright, he is safe, it just gets hard to remember sometimes. 

He still flinches often or suddenly remembers a particular torture they put him through and sometimes he catches himself still thinking in those patterns that helped him survive the hell they put him through, but which now hinder him from enjoying his life. 

But those moments don’t last and when they are over, there are other, happier moments to fill his nights. The first time he tastes sweets and apparently his face makes a very interesting impression, judging by the others’ reaction, for example. Or when Octavius and Jedediah announce that they are a couple now and everyone cheers. Or when Sacajawea teaches him about medicine and Teddy teaches him about politics and Larry makes him laugh. They still fight and argue, and it isn’t easy, but they all try. And somehow, that is enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr @leuchtstabrebell.


End file.
